Tuesday 23 March 2021

The Bathurst unicorn plague hunter


Bathurst unicorn plague hunter

Weight: 1.5 tons 

Height: 17 feet

Operational range: 30 miles (Coaling stations along Bathurst increases range to 80 miles)

Maximum speed: 35 mph

Crew: 1

Engine: Crumplette 492-B ThunderSteamer

Armarment: Forward mounted fencing sword 

Suspension: Torsion bar

Cargo: 5 boxes of masks, 1 paper towel rack, 20 incense burners

The Bathurst unicorn plague hunter was designed by Herbert Bumpledot to cull the hordes of plague carrying unicorns that have overrun Bathurst Street since 2015, when the drunken elephants were driven out. 

Unicorns have steadfastly refused to wear masks or socially distance, causing the spread of disease to increase exponentially. 

They have proven themselves highly resilient to disease, reproduce at an incredible rate, and constitute a plague in their own right.

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